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准许为人

Posted on (Update: )
标签: 睡眠  心理学 

昨天晚上打破了维持几天的早睡记录,而早上被墙外的装修队轰隆隆的施工声音吵醒。晚睡放纵的愧疚,被吵醒的烦躁,睡眠不足的倦意,压得喘不过气来…

但不管怎样,还是得拖着疲倦的身体去办公室,至少为了躲避装修队的噪声。在路上,意识到这个状态不可能学习,而直接在办公室躺着睡觉也不合适,于是决定继续看哈佛幸福课1,正好调整一下情绪。

恰好看到 the permission to be human,可以用来治疗当前糟糕的情绪。

we need a space of unconditional acceptance

experience the envy when I experienced it, accept it; and then enjoy and celebrate it

pink elephant

a space, a safe space in our lives with our closest frtiends, with our family, first and foremost, with ourselves, will we have the permission to be human

I am not talking about resignation, what I’m talking about is active acceptance.

It means understanding that certain things I cannot change and certain things I can and ought to change

the distinction between affect, behaviors and cognitions (ABC)

Unconditional acceptance, permission to be human relates primarily to our affect, to our emotions. They are there, just like the law of gravity is there.

That does not mean we need to accept our behavior and our cognition.

not helpful to reminate about painful emotions. It is much hepful to write about them, to talk to other people about them, rather than just be thinking constantly about how miserable I am because my girlfriend just left.

准许为人,不要苛求自己,有时要接受自己的不完美。但是也绝不是放纵自己,不是向任何恶习屈服。permission 应当是有条件的,不能对所有的事情都说“就这样吧”,要学会主动地接受,对于有些不能改变的事情那就顺其自然吧,就像昨天跑步时看到的华灯霓虹,而对于应当改变的事情,仍然需要寻求有效的策略进行改变,比如作息时间问题。

除此之外,为了让自己的心理防线更强大,还需要甄别更多的事情,在接受和改变之间做出选择,就像 Tal 分享的那首诗一样,

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can change and wisdom to know the difference.


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